The Paradox of Humility
You have to acknowledge your GREATNESS to be humble
You have to know you’re amazing to be humble. You have to know that you are actually better than others at some things. When you know that and you choose not to boast about it that’s humility. When you know that and you acknowledge the tasks, the people and the circumstances that contributed to your “amazingness”, that’s humility.
Humility is often confused with self-deprecation. Ironically, when you devalue your worth and your success, then you put across that your work, your contributions and your achievements don’t matter, and if they don’t matter, then there’s nothing to be humble about.
Humility it NOT:
1) Dismissing yourself in the process: Humility IS NOT making less of who you are, what you achieved and what you can become.
2) Amplifying or exaggerating others’ value over your own: Humility IS NOT making others feel better about what they’ve done, giving others credit for what you’ve done, or deflecting compliments that others attempt to give you.
3) A message to the world: Humility IS NOT an act of virtue signalling, it’s not a lesson to teach others how they should behave.
Humility is knowing that you are part of a bigger picture where everyone is adding shapes, shades and colours to create something beautiful. Humility is understanding that you are part of a broader story where the narrative changes according each adventurous contribution of the characters participating. Humility is appreciating that you are a small feature in a world that you don’t fully grasp, but understanding that it is YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to contribute the best you can so that together we create a world we love living in.
To be humble you HAVE TO acknowledge that:
1) YOU ARE GREAT - it’s not enough to know that you are good, you need to know that you are GREAT! In a world where everyone knows that they are great at something, there’s no shame in acknowledging that we’re not great at everything. It will be a world where we proudly share our greatness with each other.
2) YOU WORKED HARD – you have to know how hard you’ve worked and not dismiss the efforts you made. So often, once people complete a task, they diminish its importance. In the long run, it’s important to give yourself full credit for the hours, the perseverance and the achievements that resulted so that you will have the mental strength to do all of this again in your next project.
3) PEOPLE HELPED ALONG THE WAY - being grateful to those who have helped you along the way, is not just about going around and saying thank-you, it’s about knowing that we’re never on our own. Someone was there to push you when you were lacking in motivation (a meme online? A comment from a friend? Observing a stranger persevere in their own challenge); someone was there to hold you when you were dipping in confidence (a hug from a loved one? A cheery greeting from a pet? A smile from a stranger?) Someone’s story intertwined with yours, and your success mattered in their story, just as their success made a difference in your own.
4) LUCK HELPED but so did you - being aware that some circumstances that are out of your control worked out well is another reminder that there’s a bigger picture, broader story and a world that you don’t understand. Sometimes the weather is just right for what you needed, sometimes shop had a sale on products that you meant to buy, and sometimes traffic lights were perfectly timed so that you made it on time. These circumstances may have a meaning or a reason in someone else’s story, but for you they’re just convenient luck. (Of course, it’s also worth remembering that sometime we create our own luck by acting according to the points above).
Humility IS an act of strength through TRUTH. Humility is an ability to see yourself as a piece in the massive puzzle of life, recognising both the circumstances which you found yourself to be in, the people you surrounded yourself with, the choices you made and the lessons you learned.
Acknowledge your GREATNESS so you can be humble.